Freshman Me Was An IDIOT!

I was sitting here, going back and reading some of my old posts here on this lovely blog. And I realize several things:

1. Freshman Me really was an idiot.
A shy, clueless idiot. Yup. That was me. If Freshman Me knew then what Senior Me knows now, my high school life could have been completely different. Like if a certain incident on 300 hall never happened, I probably could have kept a close friend close. When I look back over that one, singular moment, I wish Senior Me would've ran in right then and told Freshman Me that the whole idea behind it was really, really, really stupid. Like stupid with a capital S. Like why would I even consider such a thing now? Oh right, I wouldn't because that'd be stupid. Why did I even let her talk me into doing that? Oh yeah, cuz Freshman Me was an idiot.

 2. Up until the end of 2011, I was an emotional, sappy ass kid.
*sigh* There's no way I can really explain this without embarrassing myself. But, dang, those times were hard. For me, at least. But even then, could have been completely avoidable. If only at that time I was less fragile like I am now. I was back then, for lack of a better term, a punk ass bitch. So many things got under my skin back then. And I was still growing into myself, and still had a LOT of insecurities to deal with. Plus there was that other thing (see old emotional ass posts for clarification) that I was dealing with that was ALSO completely avoidable now that I think about it. I was just such a sap. Really. Glad I grew out of that (for the most part).

3. Senior Me knows better now.
In the past year and a half, I've learned a LOT. And I've grown. A lot. As a friend, as a student, as a person. If senior year hadn't happened like it happened, I promise you, I wouldn't be the person I am today. If I hadn't gotten out of magnet, I guarantee you I'd still be that emotional, shy, stressed idiot. The people that I've been around this year have helped bring out part of my true personality that I don't show to many people (and that magnet tried to stuff away). Not the shy, quiet, dedicated student, but the loud, outgoing, happy person. The one that loves to laugh and just generally act retarded. That one. It's been a good year so far, and if it hadn't happened like it did you'd probably be looking at a different person right now.